THOUGHT 4 THE WEEK
Until we revisit the subject again, this paper concludes our overview of the Four Primary Personalities. Thanks to everyone for your excellent questions or who requested a workshop when current restrictions are lifted.
Next week we shall explore more highly effective inter-dependent skills.
CLOSING RECAP: You, me, everyone, are seen through the perception of emotiveness ~ how we attempt to control our feelings and, the perception of assertiveness ~ how we attempt to control the thoughts and actions of others.
We also have a perception of how we see ourselves. Asking family and friends how they perceive us will reinforce or challenge our self-perception (should you wish for a more scientific personal profile, email your request to email@example.com).
Based on decades of formal profiling, the *tested population roughly divides into the following:
- 1:10 ~ COOL/TELLER = controls their feelings and tells rather than asks
- 2:10 ~ COOL/ASKER = controls their feelings and asks rather than tells
- 3:10 ~ WARM/TELLER = freely show their feelings and tells rather than asks
- 4:10 ~ WARM/ASKER = freely show their feelings and asks rather than tells
The above grouping reveals we each have a 60% to 90% chance of damaging a new relationship if we are not paying attention! Think of any occasion that seriously backfired emotionally or financially and you’ll get the message.
I Like Me Best When I’m With You
Modifying your behaviour (not changing your personality) to accommodate another’s behaviour, is the foundation of our interpersonal skills coaching. When applied effectively, the recipient of your consideration tends to respond in kind. Result: Win/Win.
Over the past several decades we happily claim that those who assimilate and apply our day-to-day methods progress to higher echelon’s in their business venture or chosen career:
- Businesses have a higher retention of workforce and receive greater customer acclaim
- Salespeople achieve the highest rewards, recognition and referrals
- Recruiters dramatically improve career placement and client satisfaction
- Families prosper
Sincerely Answer These Four Questions:
- In my team ~ are the bulk of my people loyal and productive?
- In direct selling ~ is my presentation to acceptance ratio better than 7-in-10 with referrals freely volunteered?
- In recruiting ~ do at least 9:10 engaged happily perform beyond minimum expectation?
- In my relationships ~ do they remain positive even when in serious disagreement?
Undeniably, more relationships fail due to a clash of personalities than for any other single reason. Most profoundly, this does not have to be the outcome!
To discuss this paper, or your workshop email firstname.lastname@example.org or call 0044 7900 251258
Complicated IS Easy! Simple IS Hard!
*millions as at the time of writing
RECAP: We offer 13 simple interpersonal strategies for the effective accommodation of each of the sixteen identifiable personalities and have, in particular, considered these strategies associated with the COOL/TELLER, with a backup personality of the WARM/ASKER, which we term, Lecturer.
At first, a combination of opposing traits may seem conflicting. More often than not, however, they can result in synergy as the backup trait tends to temper the primary trait.
Over recent weeks we have explored the first seven effectiveness strategies of the Lecturer: General Characteristics; Positives; Negatives; Greatest Fear; Motivation; Ideal Environment; and, Desires.
Let’s now consider the remaining effectiveness strategies: 8 through 13:
8. Analysing Information ~ This combination learns from the past. They build for the future. They may underestimate inherent risk. They may involve others to assist them to break down the details. They use information as a means to work towards a defined goal. They may ignore alternative ways of doing things. They may misinterpret instruction. They can be persuaded by those they respect.
9. Personal Growth ~ This combination needs to express their feelings more freely. They need to manage expectations better. They need to be less moody. They need to be open to debate. They need to invite others to contribute. They need to be aware of their voice-tone. They need to be aware of their body language. They need to accept change is sometimes necessary. They need to adopt more openness with others. They need to become more flexible.
10. Management Style ~ This combination can be demanding. They can be direct. They can be withdrawn. They seek tangible results. They may assume others understand more than they do. They are capable of seeing the sociable way to accomplish things. They work deliberately. They can be conciliatory. They can be caring.
11. Working with this Combination ~ This combination wants to know what is specifically wanted of them. They want you to do what you said you will do. They want you to assume your own problem-solving role. They want you to ask if you do not know something. They want you to stick to the task at hand. They want you to provide reasons why they are being asked to commit. They want you to be patient when instituting change. They want you to remain engaged. They want you to avoid confrontation. They want you to avoid using harsh voice-tones. They want you to avoid aggressive body language.
12. Suitable Job-roles ~ Lecturer - Writer - Researcher - Trouble-shooter – Planner – Instructor – Head of Department
13. Accommodating Each Of The Four Primary Personalities
The Pure COOL/TELLER ~ is a lot like you; but higher in assertiveness and a lower in responsiveness. You will need to keep your will to win in check. Allow them to arrive at the appropriate decision by placing positive options before them. If you attempt to compete, they will want to win. The WHAT is important to you both!
The Pure WARM/ASKER ~ shares some traits in common with you, but is lower in assertiveness and higher in responsiveness. Be careful not to rush them. If this happens, they may capitulate and withdraw. You will need to share their feelings, and offer your own. This personality does things for others. They seek constant reassurance. The WHY is important to them!
The Pure WARM/TELLER ~ is higher in assertiveness and higher in responsiveness than you. You will need to chillax, unwind and express how you are ‘feeling’ from time to time. Show them you can have a bit of fun, too. Wonder off the subject now and then to achieve a mental break. This is a mutual relationship of esteem. A relationship of collaboration. The WHO is important to them!
The Pure COOL/ASKER ~ is lower in assertiveness, but similar to you in responsiveness. You will need to offer suggestions rather than directions and provide evidence rather than make decisions. They do not believe in single outcomes. They believe compromise is the best course of action in most circumstances. The HOW is important to them!
Should you fundamentally disagree with the above strategies, please respond with your reasons.
TO REQUEST YOUR TEAM WORKSHOP, OR A FREE COPY OF THE MUTUALLY BENEFICIAL LEADERSHIP GRID, EMAIL email@example.com or call 0044 7900 251258.
Complicated Is Easy! Simple Is Hard!
RECAP: Last week we mentioned there are 13 interpersonal strategies for the effective accommodation of each of the sixteen identifiable Personalities.
As an example, we considered strategy 1:13 General Characteristics of the COOL/TELLER who has a backup personality of the WARM/ASKER. We call this particular combination: ‘Lecturer’.
Remember: A pure C/T is low in emotiveness and high in assertiveness, whereas a pure W/A is high in emotiveness and low in assertiveness.
Even this apparent clash of traits results in synergy. Let’s explore strategies 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, & 7 of the 13 that make up The Lecturer:
Strategy 2: Positives ~ This combination is a goal setter. They define tasks to be completed. They can see the end from the beginning. They are content to work alone. They steer others towards deadlines. They maintain a status-quo. They use systems as a means of controlling the action. They strive to accomplish. They seek answers. They argue constructively.
Strategy 3: Negatives ~ This combination protects confidences. They may underestimate their own accountability. They may override the opinions of others. They may sacrifice relationships for results. They do not accept criticism well. They internalise doubt. They can be moody. They can hold a grudge. They may become defensive.
Strategy 4: Greatest Fear ~ This combinations greatest fear is being censured.
Strategy 5: Motivation ~ This combination eagerly engages with problem-solving. They want to know they can rely on all involved. They identfy and plan for desired outcomes. They welcome positive reinforcement. They are self-motivated. They accept counsel from respected peers and supervisors.
Strategy 6: Ideal Environment ~ This combination wants a functional environment. They work best when leading a task group. They work to a plan. They favour systems and protocol. They want regular dialogue. They want minimal conflict. They want leaders that know what they are doing.
Strategy 7: Desires ~ This combination desires freedom from detail. They desire objectivity. They desire a degree of autonomy. They desire competent leadership.They desire a challenge. They desire time to make a difference. They desire doing things in the prescribed manner. They desire team cooperation.
TO EXPLORE THIS PAPER, REQUEST YOUR TEAM WORKSHOP, OR A FREE COPY OF MUTUALLY BENEFICIAL LEADERSHIP GRID, EMAIL firstname.lastname@example.org or call 0044 7900 251258.
Next week, we shall look at strategies 8 to 13:
8. Analysing Information;
9. Personal Growth;
10. Management Style;
11. Working With Them;
12. Best Careers; and,
Complicated IS Easy! Simple IS Hard!
Let me open this paper by stating everyone in the whole world, the universe and everywhere is ultimately unique. There is only one of you. There is only one of me.
Attempting to identify 8-billion individual personalities on this planet, however, is less than helpful on an interpersonal level and takes a very, very, very long time.
Yet, with a bit of practice anyone can perceive someone else’s personality by mentally answering two simple questions:
Q1. How do they attempt to control their own feelings when in the company of other people?
Q2. How do they attempt to control the feelings and actions of the people they are with?
When answering the above two questions, mentally plot your perception to each on a scale of: 1 meaning high; 2 meaning moderately high; 3 meaning moderately low; and, 4 meaning low,
For example: in answering Q1 above, let’s say you perceive someone displays low emotion (E) but not in the extreme. So, you mentally plot them in the E2 column on the grid below.
In answer to Q2, you perceive the same person displays high assertiveness (A) but again, not in the extreme. So, you plot them along the A2 line on the grid below.
Where the two plots intersect determines your perception of that persons personalty, which can be amazingly accurate:
How Does This Benefit That Relationship?
You have identified a COOL/TELLER with a WARM/ASKER backup (E2A2 on the grid above).
As a description of their general behaviour traits, this combination possesses moderate assertiveness, meaning they recognise the need to take charge, and moderate responsiveness, meaning they reserve their feelings for those they trust. They display sympathetic directness. They lead by example. They accept responsibility. They may require time to adjust. They may experience swings in mood.
Quid Pro Quo
To discuss this paper, request your Mutually Beneficial Leadership profiling system or arrange a team workshop, email email@example.com or call 0044 7900 251258
NB: To effectively manage personal productivity within a team, UETP applies twelve specific relationship strategies relating to each of the sixteen personalities.
Complicated IS Easy! Simple IS Hard!
I Like Me Best When I'm With You, Again!
Last week we overviewed how mature high assertive personalities accommodate other personalities. This week, we take a look at the low assertive personalities.
RECAP: Recognising and accommodating Primary Personality (PP) is critical to continued success in your chosen career, your business, and your family. Getting it right rewards both the emotional and financial outcome for all involved.
If you profile as a WARM/ASKER or a COOL/ASKER the two groups that follow commence with someone you recognise as possessing the same emotiveness and assertiveness as you. The remaining three strategies in each grouping are with those who possess little or no common behaviour traits with you.
Take a moment to remind yourself of your own qualities by reading and re-reading each respective opening paragraph. Then progress through each strategy willing to role-shift for a mutually beneficial outcome. The opening paragraph to each group describes someone just like you:
If You Are A WARM/ASKER
The WARM/ASKER ~ is just like you; high in emotiveness and low in assertiveness. You will get along as friends just fine, which could be a problem as someone needs to ‘take charge’. Know what you want from each meeting, even if it’s nothing at all. You will have little fear of capitulation. Each of you is motivated by personal trust. The WHY is important to you both!
The COOL/TELLER ~ is low in emotiveness and high in assertiveness: the antithesis to you! You need to prepare to argue your case, even compete a little. They will want to make the decision, which is OK with you, but be sure to place a win/win option before them. They are motivated by results. The WHAT is important to them!
The COOL/ASKER ~ is much lower in emotiveness than you, and low in assertiveness just like you. You need to keep your emotions in check. Become matter-of-fact as you explore alternative ways to achieve a balanced outcome. They believe compromise is the best course of action. They are motivated by facts and figures. The HOW is important to them!
The WARM/TELLER ~ is the same in emotiveness as you but higher in assertiveness. Be prepared to have a little fun along the way. This is a relationship of collaboration so present your case using occasional humour and anecdote. They are motivated by the testimony of others. The WHO is important to them!
If You Are A COOL/ASKER
The COOL/ASKER ~ is just like you; low in emotiveness and assertiveness. Your joint planning must lead to a conclusion or you both may get lost in the process! You each believe compromise is the best course of action. Each of you is motivated by facts and figures. The HOW is important to you both!
The WARM/TELLER ~ is high in both emotiveness and assertiveness; the antithesis to you! You will need to lighten-up a lot and prepare to have some fun along the way. This is a relationship of collaboration, so be prepared to present your case using occasional light humour and anecdote. They are motivated by the testimony of others. The WHO is important to them!
The COOL/TELLER ~ is similar in emotiveness to you but higher in assertiveness. You need to prepare to argue your case based on desired results, and not just the process of getting there. Be prepared to Compete but let them have the final decision by placing win/win options before them. They are motivated by results. The WHAT is important to them!
The WARM/ASKER ~ is much higher in emotiveness than you but similar in assertiveness. You will need to become a friend before displaying technical skill. People are central to their lives. Be prepared to help them make decisions by lowering risk to their loved ones and business associates. If you are too mechanical, they will capitulate and then cancel. They are motivated by personal trust. The WHY is important to them!
To explore this paper, order your FREE pdf copy of: ‘Who Do I Think I Am: Say Hello To Your Personality’ or arrange your workshop, email firstname.lastname@example.org But hurry, only 7 of 100 free copies remain.
Complicated IS Easy! Simple IS Hard!
0044 7900 251258