25. Mar, 2021

Part 3 ~ 'If You Want A Friend, Know Who You Are Dealing With'

(continued from 18th March 2021)

RECAP: Everyone is a mix of behaviour traits, however, each person tends to display one of four predominant Primary Personalities (PP). Making friends means taking active steps to be relatable to someone's PP. We commence this process by recognising similarities and/or differences between our own PP, and the PP of the people we are with.

Cautionary Note: if you choose not to make friends with any particular person, know why other than, you just don’t like them. Of course, they might not relate to your PP should you be unprepared to role-shift!

LAST WEEK, we explored how someone who was profiled with low-emotiveness & high-assertiveness (COOL/TELLER) needs to adjust their behaviour ~ role-shift ~ when dealing with someone just like themselves. As always, such observation requires constant awareness with persistent practice; the purpose of UETP interpersonal skills coaching.

THIS WEEK, we explore how to recognise each of the other three PPs. Remember, putting yourself in situations where you routinely meet/observe people provides the best opportunity of learning how to gather their 5-Clues:

  1. Conversation, including first greeting
  2. Choice of clothes
  3. Preferred environment
  4. Use of time, and
  5. Making decisions

The WARM/TELLER (3-in-10 people) ~ makes the world a brighter place. They …

Clue 1: greet people with enthusiasm; their conversation is up-beat

Clue 2: prefer to dress bright and showy; panache

Clue 3: prefer an informal environment

Clue 4: want some time for fun; before getting down to the serious stuff

Clue 5: are influenced by what significant people have done

NOTE: If you naturally relate with the above description, you are probably that PP. If you find two or more elements particularly challenging, you are probably not. In either case, make a list of those who come to mind that tend to fit the above description. We shall explore what they need for making friends next week.

The WARM/ASKER (4-in-10 people) ~ makes the world a more harmonious place. They ...

Clue 1: greet people as friends; their conversation is cordial

Clue 2: prefer to dress for comfort; not style

Clue 3: prefer a homely environment; even comfy

Clue 4: need time to make friends, first

Clue 5: need trusted friends to help them decide

NOTE: If you naturally relate with the above description, you are probably that PP. If you find two or more elements particularly challenging, you are probably not. In either case, make a list of those who come to mind that tend to fit the above description. We shall explore what they need for making friends next week.

The COOL/ASKER (2-in-10 people) ~ makes the world a more orderly place. They …

Clue 1: greet people cautiously; their conversation is enquiring

Clue 2: prefer to dress formally; even somberly

Clue 3: prefer an almost clinical environment

Clue 4: need time to assess the facts

Clue 5: decide on a balance of consequence; not absolute solutions

NOTE: If you naturally relate with the above description, you are probably that PP. If you find two or more elements particularly challenging, you are probably not. In either case, make a list of those who come to mind that tend to fit the above description. We shall explore what they need for making friends next week.

TO BE CONTINUED NEXT WEEK … How we role-shift.

To explore this paper, or arrange your interpersonal skills workshop email infor@uetp.co.uk

Complicated IS Easy! Simple IS Hard!