20. May, 2020

PART 2 ~ Frequently Asked Questions

Last week’s BLOG (13th May) addressed FAQs No. 1 Through 5:

  1. Are People Really This Predictable?
  2. Surely Everyone Possesses Some Of Each Personality?
  3. Won’t People See Me As Something I’m Not?
  4. Do Personalities Really Perform Certain Roles Better?
  5. Can This Material Genuinely Improve Team Productivity?

This week we address FAQs No. 6 Through 10:

6. Does Motivation Determine How We Behave?

Motivation determines WHY we do something or keep on doing it. It is our personal rewards system, which is situational, meaning the classic six motivating-values ebb and flow as they are satisfied or become unsatisfied (this for another paper).

For instance, if we compare senior religious leaders with senior business executives, we often observe a Cool/Teller at work (see 7th May BLOG). Though most organisational leaders display similar primary personality, individual motivations vary significantly. In the above case, spiritual versus commercial.

Remember, personality determines HOW someone does something, not WHY they do it! [For insight into WHY people do things see, BEST YOU: PART III Motivating Values].

7. Surely Personality Changes With Age?

It is possible for some people to become more accommodating as their years progress. That is to say, they appear more tolerant of others, especially within family. This may come about as they reflect upon their personal life experiences ~ especially trauma ~ or because they simply find peace in tuning-out.

I ask, why wait until retirement to get on better with people?  If we learn and apply inter-personal skills awareness sooner, we will reap the harvest of better relationships sooner. Husbands and wives will get on better; parents with their children; teachers with pupils; doctors with patients; and those at work or who run businesses with colleagues and customers. QED!

8. Does Work Experience Improve Interpersonal Responses?

The aim of our coaching is to ’maximise per capita yield with minimum per capita maintenance’. Every positive organisational bottom-line depends on it!

But, to answer the above question, appropriate work experience helps appropriately! This is especially true if inter-personal skills awareness training is an integral part of Continuous Professional Development. Organisations who truly commit to people skills invariably become market leaders.

 9. What About ‘Nature’ Versus ‘Nurture’?

There is one school of thought that personality is predominantly genetic i.e. nature. Another school argues personality is predominantly learned i.e. nurture. Each school of thought cites the outcomes of identical twins.

The first school observed identical twins raised within their birth family. The second school observed identical twins seperated at birth and raised within their foster families. In the first case sibling personalities were often similar. In the second case sibling personalities often differed.

You are the judge of these and other arguments for or against nature and nature. My way of thinking is it doesn’t matter much how someone’s personality became wired. What does matter is that you and I learn to accommodate what we see and hear before us. Complicated is Easy!

10. The Next Step?

The inevitable outcome for the worthy practitioner of these amazing skills is higher emotional and financial satisfaction in all that you do with and through people. Though Simple is Hard, I hope we have demonstrated that accommodating personality is do-able with persistent attention to others and consistent practice of these interpersonal skills.

So …

I. If not already completed, use the grid from the MATRIX (see 28th April) to profile the people most important to you. Then, form your interpersonal strategy to accommodate each.

II. Without getting mysterious & spooky, pay attention to your family and friends more closely. Observe work colleagues and customers. Observe couples in restaurants, pubs, clubs and supermarkets. Observe media coverage of politicians. Observe leading film and TV characters. Observe people walking their dogs, in shopping malls and on public transport. Observe everyone, everywhere. You’ll be amazed how quickly you’ll learn to accommodate each of the four primary personalities at play.

III. Buy a copy of ‘Peoplewatching’ by Desmond Morris, first published in 2002

IV. Buy a copy of BEST YOU Part 1: Who Do I Think I Am? (see BOOKS tag at the top of this page)


Complicated IS Easy! Simple IS Hard!